Sunday, 1 October 2017

Single, Don't Want to Mingle

If you’re single, raise your hand.

Now, raise your hand if you want to be single.

When I asked my creative writing class the last one, every hand went down. This got me thinking, what exactly is wrong with being single?

Just to preface this: I’ve never been in a relationship, I don’t want to be in a relationship, and I’m quite happy with my inevitable future of becoming the resident crazy cat lady, so my experience with love and relationships is entirely what I’ve seen from other people. And honestly? I don’t see the appeal.

In my opinion, relationships just take up time and effort that I could be putting somewhere more useful. For example, the ever-growing mound of college work that, much like the items in Bellatrix Lestrange’s Gringotts vault, burns me and multiplies every time I touch it. And when I’m not busy with that? Well, you can bet that I’ll be spending my free time doing fun, mindless things that I want to do, not sat on someone’s lap making kissy faces.

Don’t get me wrong, I do think true love is out there; I firmly believe it’s impossible to hear the way Ellen DeGeneres talks about Portia de Rossi and not think so. If being in a relationship would truly make you happy, then I’m sure there’ll be a Prince Albert to your Queen Victoria somewhere out there (except hopefully not your first cousin). I’m just saying that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to be single. After all, Queen Elizabeth I never married and she did pretty well for herself, didn’t she?

Society puts so much emphasis on relationships, and you can see it everywhere. Babies who waddle remotely close to one another being referred to as a future couple. High school kids gossiping about their crushes and firmly believing that you’re lying about not having one. Valentine’s day, a can of worms I am absolutely not opening here. There’s never any doubt that everyone will one day find the perfect partner and settle down, but sometimes people don’t want to do that, and that’s completely fine.

Relationships aren’t everything. If you don’t want to be in one, don’t get into one solely to please the people around you. Proudly embrace the single life. Marathon that series you’ve wanted to watch. Hug a friend. Eat those chicken nuggets. You only have yourself to impress, so why not go all out?

By Beth Robertson